Worst Jokes Ever
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A buccaneer!
Just all us depressed people joking about our depressed lives, we should hang out sometime.
Apparently, as a 4-year-old, Hitler was saved from drowning in the river Passau by a local priest.
Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.
If you were on the Titanic and you didn't leave the ship, what would you do? Just let that sink in.
Only one of Kenny's girlfriends has ever said he's good in bed.
But she has to. She's his mom.
Why are Americans bad chess players?
They lost two towers.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?
Are you ready, kids?🤣
Friends are like penguins.
If you stab a penguin, they die.
What's harder than steel? Michael Jackson at a playground.
Kid: Are you gay?
Me: No, I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on.
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable (A), beautiful (B), cute (C), delightful (D), elegant (E), fashionable (F), gorgeous (G), and hot (H)."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Q: You want to know why I don’t make jokes about 9/11?
A: They tend to crash and burn.
I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. What a waste of thyme.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
Teacher: "People with depression never get anywhere in life."
Student 1: "My mom has depression, but she died."
Student 2: "My sister has depression and she's going to therapy."
Student 3: "My dad has depression, and he's doing REALLY well."
I just found out I'm colorblind. It came out of the yellow.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd get in the van if I were you...
What do you get when you cross a panhandler, a politician, a lobbyist, a prostitute, a sodomite, and a Jehovah's Witness knocking on your door at your house to convert you to their religion?
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end.
I am glass! People see right through me.