Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an ex-lesbian?
A clitter quitter.
What's the difference between an orphan and Stuart Little?
Stuart Little got chosen!
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and your parents?
Nothing. They are both just memories.
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? Because they don’t have a Mother’s and Father’s Day.
Why would Tommy kill Philza's wife just to make Phil believe she didn't exist?
LIKE AND SUB IF YOU LI/j
What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because it can’t find home.
If I fall in love with my depression, maybe it'll leave me too.
(Took this from my other account @Toby :) btw)
Chapter 1. "Kid teacher"
Mrs. Lewis: Class, I want everyone to look at their textbooks and find a reasonable essay topic. My suggestion is page 232 or 678. Now, this essay counts as the final grade for the semester. Now do it, or you will repeat 5th grade again! Now turn to page 100, and we'll start reading from there. Do you all understand?
Neilela: Yes ma'am, quick question, we don't have to do it today... do we?
Mrs. Lewis: Yes! It is today!
Andrua: It sounds boring, and all I have to do today is be a big jerk who gives way too much instruction.
Mrs. Lewis: Anyway, let's get to work.
56 hours later.
Mrs. Lewis: Kids, when I call you, please tell me what you liked about your essay. When I call your name, Carl.
Carl: Why me? Yes?
Mrs. Lewis: What did you like about the story, Carl?
Carl: Um... I liked it when... um... um... um... um...
Jeklen: He didn't even read the story because he's too busy trying to look up the letter "J" and its meaning!
Carl: Jeklen, shut up and stop biting your hair.
Jeklen: At least I know what the letter "J" is.
Mrs. Lewis: Class, please listen. Carl, did you read the story that I asked you?
Carl: Well, not really because you were the one reading it in class, so...
Vronica: For real!
Carl: Mhmmm
Mrs. Lewis: Listen class, this homework needs to be done today! DO IT!
Kimbriel: Ms. Lewis, I have a lot of questions about tonight's homework.
Mrs. Lewis: Yes?
Kimbriel: You assigned so many things just for a little test! What?
Mrs. Lewis: I need a break! Peyton, you're in charge!
All students: NO, NOT PEYTON !!!!!!
Peyton: Me? In charge? Of the class?
Jessica: Wow, but you're all about the boredom!
Peyton: Shut up! yeeeeeeee
Peyton: Ms. Lewis, there must be a mistake, how can I be in charge? I'm 11... I think...
Ari: To think that yesterday she thought she was 8 years old.
Oh sorry... I think.
Mrs. Lewis: Have you ever heard of a teacher's vacation?
All students: That's not a thing!
I never heard of it...
Mrs. Lewis: Well, me and Ms. Sumrall, we are going on a "teacher vacation", we can do it because we become calmer, or we don't get angry at the students. AND WE CAN DO IT!
Khloe: Why?
Mrs. Lewis: Because I am an adult.
Ms. Sumrall: Is Petrina ready?
Ms. Lewis: Yes, thank goodness for this!
Kenya: Bye? "Chapter 2" To be continued...
What is the difference between a flower and an orphan?
A flower gets picked.
We are all just suicidal kids telling other kids not to do it.
Why did the baker give the shopper a butt? Because she asked for a butt!
What is an Irish kiss?
Fellatio from a gay Irishman.
Before my grandad died, he whispered to me, "Is your uncle still in the basement?" I said he has died. Oh, my grandad said, "I will lock him in heaven's basement."
Where do cows go for entertainment?
The MOOOOvie theater.
Yesterday I bought my daughter a cat, but accidentally hit her with the car today. I have no idea what to do with the cat now.
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
People should build orphanages next to graveyards so at least orphans can see their parents.