Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a kid laying down in the classroom? Kill confirmed.
What do you call three kids laying down in the classroom? Kill streak.
The little girl's dad was Jewish and her mom was Catholic. Mom had been taking the little girl to church every Sunday.
One Sunday, during High Mass, the little girl whispers to her mom, “Mom, can we go home now?”
“No honey, not yet,” replied the mother, “the Mass is only half over.”
“Then we can go now, Mom. I'm half Jewish.”
TV Darth Vader: "I'm your father!"
Orphans: "Yea."
What do you call a space Muslim?
A Tusken Raider.
"Can't go under it, can't go over it, we gotta go through it!"
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she has no arms.
What time do babies get dirty?
Playtime.
What did one snow ❄️ man say to itself? My arm is broken.
Q: Why does an orphan do badly at Baseball?
A: Because they can't find home.
How did the coke seller react when someone told him a joke?
He CRACKed up.
Once, I tried to say, "P.P. That's funny right there." Instead, I said, you guessed it, "Penis!"
Why is it that skinny men love fat women?
Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!
How do you know that your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes weird.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To wipe the chicken's ass!
There is this fish, and this fish thinks if that fly drops 6 inches, I’m gonna jump out the water and eat that fucking fish!
Then there is a bear, he thinks if that fly drops six inches, that fish jumps up - I’m gonna run out there and eat that fucking fish!
This huntsman also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps up, bear runs out, eats the fish. I’m gonna shoot that fucking bear.
Unbelievably there is a tiny little brave mouse, who also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps, bear runs, huntsman shoots,
He’s bound to drop that cheese sandwich in his back pocket!!!!
I’m gonna eat that fucking cheese sandwich!!
Meanwhile...
there’s This cat!!!’ He sees what’s going on - if they fly drops six inches -the fish =bear =huntsman =mouse eating the cheese sarnie....
Easy pickings...
Anyway bang 💥 the fly drops six inches. Fish jumps up. Bear grabs the fish. Huntsman shoots the fucking bear,
DROPS HIS CHEESE SARNIE!!
Cat runs after mouse trying to get the cheese sarnie
The cat slips over him (stacks it) cat falls in the river...
LONG STORY I KNOW BUT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS...
every time a fly drops six inches a pussy get wet)
WALLOP... try remembering all that in A pub pissed. Xx
What do you call a Taliban in a bath bomb?
What is soccer like when you lose your soccer ball?
Orphan: "My Parents."
Yo momma so fat, she tried to eat a pie chart.
Tell an orphan: if you got no parents, clap your hands.