Worst Jokes Ever
How do parents punish a blind kid? They rearrange the furniture.
What are Michael Jackson’s pronouns? He/heeeeeee.
Who is the man behind all lives matter?
Michael Jackson.
My girlfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
What do you call it when two transgender midgets have sex?
And microtransaction.
They made a horror movie about the Chinese president.
It's called "Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey."
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, I’d rather be single than with someone like you.
Kobe Bryant never missed a shot.
But he nailed that mountain.
Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.
When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."
Everyone: So, wait, let me get this straight. Feminists want to cancel Father's Day because it is offensive to single mothers.
Feminists: Correct.
Everyone: Then what the f*** is the point of Mother's Day?
Name an ant which is very heavy?
Eleph-ant.
What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!
At baseball practice...
"Hey John, did you bring the bucket of balls?"
"No, but I got two right here."
You have a six-minute timer to live, but when you breathe, it resets.
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed.
Why do orphans love having sex?
Because they can finally call somebody "daddy."
You know what an emo gets for his birthday? A rope.
Why didn't Logan Paul high five the Asian man? Because he loves to leave Asians hanging.
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
Are you suicide? Because you are always on my mind.