Worst Jokes Ever
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.
Violets are blue, roses are red.
Last night your mom was giving me head.
So the other day, I saw a child in a wheelchair.
He was getting bullied a lot, so I came up and said, "Why don't you stand up to those bullies?"
What's Juice WRLD's favorite place to shop at?
Answer: Forever 21.
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would just crash and burn.
What would an orphan priest call himself?
Father Les.
I just thought of the best invention ever: a vape dildo.
An attractive man and a blonde meet in an elevator.
"Where are you heading today?" the man asks.
"I'm going down to give blood."
"How much do you get paid for giving blood?"
"About $30."
"Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100."
The woman, slightly annoyed, gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again.
"Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?"
"Sperm bank," she mumbles with her mouth full.
"Most Deadly Sport"
Playing chicken with a train!
Do you guys know how to make a hoe in Minecraft?
You pick it up off the street.
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
Dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never eat anything that is family size.
A nucleus walked into a bar. He asked the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, NO CHARGE!”
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.
"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"
"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."
It did not rain very often when Chuck Norris was a kid.
Why?
Because his favorite childhood song was "Rain Rain Go Away."
Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?
They all shoot people for a living.
A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building.
He yells, "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"
If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies?
A swallow.