Worst Jokes Ever
A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing.
The beer bottle says: "If you break me, you get one year of bad luck."
The mirror scoffs: "Oh, that's nothing. You break me and you get 7 years of bad luck."
The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing.
"I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."
Why do orphans eat water with their cereal? Because their father never came home with milk.
Your hairline goes so far back it remembers the big band.
Yo mama so fat, when she bought a fur coat, she made a whole species extinct.
My friend was in a crash, so when he got put in a wheelchair, people bullied him, so I told him to stand up for himself.
What was Hitler’s favorite sex position?
Sixty nein.
I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.
Why do you call a fat midget?
Jiggly Puff.
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.
I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
What does an orphan and a military man not have in common? Neither gets to go back home.
Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?
Because you can’t take medicine on an empty stomach.
Why couldn't the orphan watch Spiderman? He couldn't find his way home.
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a Covid test and got an F.
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
Joker gives Batman a phone.
Thomas: "Uhh, son, we need to talk... about the uhh, dressing up."
Martha: "Hello dearie, Brucie, is it ok if you visit me when you go to Joker's house?"
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
Why was the two-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the meat section from the dairy section.