Worst Jokes Ever
What does Osama bin Laden have in common with Spongebob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, filled full of holes.
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
This isn't ketchup.
My friend said he wanted to die, and I told him not to jump. But when he screamed, "Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to Jackass!" I knew it was over.
Me: *Meets girl, starts to form crush* Me after I get enough courage to talk to her: “Are you a casket lid because I want you on top of me?”
“What do you call my friend group?” “Suicide Squad.”
People complain we are overpopulated.
Well, then if we committed suicide, then why do they be sad? It's one less person to think about. Why complain about it when in the end we become sad people?
What did the lesbian vampire say to the heterosexual woman after the lesbian vampire was done licking the pussy of the heterosexual woman?
"When is your next blood period?"
My principal called my mom at school and said, "You should teach your son well." After coming back home, at first she taught me sex!
How do you know when your sister is on her period? When your dad's cock tastes of blood.
Everyone's had a mind-blowing day before, just ask JFK.
My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.
I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.
What do you call a physically handicapped heterosexual man that is in a wheelchair and German?
A physically handicapped promiscuous heterosexual man that is German.
What do the initials NOW stand for?
(A.) National Organization For Women
(B.) National Organization of Whores
(C.) All the above
Answer:
Since the initials NOW can stand for anything, the correct answer is all the above.
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
Why is it so difficult to watch hentai?
They moan louder than your speakers.
I told a blind man to read more, so he grabbed my arm and read the whole dictionary.
What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?
Mixed nuts.
My brother caught Covid last month.
First I knew about it was when he speed-dialled me at 3am and gasped, "I can't breathe, I can't breathe!"
I just told him straight: "Bro... you really need to work on your George Floyd jokes."
The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the World Trade Center.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
Why can't orphans play poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.