Worst Jokes Ever

My dog stepped on a bee, My child spilt my tea, I drank my hot tea, I broke my bloody knee, Now I'm lying in agony, And I'm devastated with no glee.

(Again, credits to my really funny friend)

What do you call a blind Nazi?

A Not-See!

What do snowmen call snowballs?

Children!

Me in 2078 when the COVID-19 delta alpha theta beta cya layta alligayta nlgga chungus sussy deef clussy sussy bussy cunnybrap variant comes out and I need to stay in lockdown for another 2 years with my new mandated virus stopper buttplug 9000.

Yo momma so fat, when she went for a health consultation, the doc told her to make do with health insurance.

What did the water say to the beach?

Nothing, it just waved!

Yo mama so fat... she brought a spoon... to the SUPER BOOOOOOWL! YEAHHHHHHH!!!!!

I brought a cow and named him Mayo.

Mayo Neighs!

What would you do after seeing your most loved one shot? Reload.

After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says "WTF!"

Fatherless jokes.

What mountain do runners race on?

Mount Rushmore.

Gwen, are you there?

What did the shark say when he ate a clownfish? He said it tasted a little funny.

I am looking for a Robert "Jamie" Weber. He is a friend of mine from 3rd grade that welcomed me as the new kid. I am currently in 6th grade going into 7th grade (summer brake).

I like my woman how I like my wine, just under 2 years old.

I AM FUCKING HAPPY AS HELL.

Not everyone is perfect. Just take Charles Manson, for example.

Was (DYM 118)

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't reach home.