Why do humans hate aliens?
Because Fortnite took them out of the game, and I want aliens back in Fortnite!
Why do humans hate aliens?
Because Fortnite took them out of the game, and I want aliens back in Fortnite!
I'm back and wearing dead whites who are killing whites from Eastern Europe on me. Shout out my boy russia and Ukraine, they all are evil just like USA and China and the rest of the west!
I'm Pickle Rick from Fortnite hahahahahaha!
Transgenders! Men in disguise!
Are you a building?
Cuz I rate you 9/11.
The time is 9:11, time to put your phones on airplane mode.
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"
What do you call a dwarf skating on ice?
A midget spinner.
What do you call a stoned Mexican?
Baked bean.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground meat.
Two friends are in a hospital lobby. Friend 2 notices Friend 1 crying.
Friend 1: "*crying hysterically*"
Friend 2: "Why are you crying?"
Friend 1: "I came here for a blood test."
Friend 2: "So? Are you afraid?"
Friend 1: "No. For the blood test, they cut my finger."
Friend 2: "*crying hysterically*"
Friend 1: "Why are you crying?"
Friend 2: "I came here for a urine test."
Happy New Year! 🍆🍑🍆🍑
READ THIS OUT LOUD:
This is this cat.
This is is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is a busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat this is seconds cat.
NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.
Me: Knock knock.
My Grandma: Who’s there?
Me: Interrupting cow.
My Grandma: Interrupting c-
[Dies from heart attack]
Why can't Kobe go shopping?
He's dead.
What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?
The hairline is way straighter.
SOOOO my sister said her first bad word yesterday. "Shit." My mum was like, "What did you just say, child?"
Sister: "I said the cat shits inside like the dog shi- uh oh......"
Now I've avoided this stuff by making my own word: Sugarplum. Sugarplum = shit...
My sister made some pie, and it tasted horribly... so I said this.... "This pie is very sugarplum-y." She said, "What do you mean by that?" I said, "It tastes like sugarplums..."
Erectile dysfunction.
What comes after 69?
Mouthwash.
I scaled your forehead, and all I saw was 1000.