Worst Jokes Ever

Why did NASA have to go to space? Because space is lonely.

What do you call Jan[uary] 6th?

White people smearing shit on the walls of the capitol!

An orphan saw a tornado, and he thought he saw his mom, but then he realized it was a corpse and said, "Hi, Dad!"

I threw my boomerang and now I live in constant fear.

I was hit by a car. Later, my ex lost her bus job.

One day an orphan threw a boomerang, but it came back, just like its parents.

What's the difference between a goat and a sex slave?

I don't have a slave in my sex dungeon.

What happens if you play with Santa’s ball? You get a white Christmas.

What's the difference between a piano, a pot of glue, and a tuna fish?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.

What about the glue?

I knew you'd get stuck there.

How are orphans and apples different?

One gets picked.

You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!

A Down syndrome child is drowning, he calls for help with all of his voice: "Somebody help me!! I'm Downing!"

BA DUM TSS

I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.

I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.

What kind of fish do people eat?

Deep-fried fish.

Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!

I don't joke about 9/11 because I lost my dad. He was the best pilot I ever knew.

I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies.

She is not “fun to be around.”

The UK is a joke. I want to leave ASAP.

What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?

I don't have a sex slave in my basement...