Worst Jokes Ever
I fucked a wall.
"Roses are red, Shut up and go to bed!"
When you hide in the girl's bathroom so the school shooter won't go in there: 😃
When you notice that the school shooter is female: 😟
My friend said she was tired of seeing me every day.
So I pushed her off the side of a cliff.
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"
Ebay is so useless. I tried searching up lighters, and all they had was 13,749 matches.
What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!
Mommy, mommy, why do I keep running around in circles?
Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!
Why can an orphan only get an iPhone X?
Because there is no home button.
What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A: A bed.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet? A: 11. A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
Dawn rises on the Serengeti, and she has no idea as to how she got there.
I really like those "driverless cars." I saw loads of them last week in the car park.
It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.
From the makers of Mangeone...
Please go subscribe to Kane Brown, people; he has good songs. Please go subscribe to him, please.
People at school thought I had special powers. It was something called "Constant supervision."
What flavor do you buy an orphan?
Self raising.
Sleep and death are alike; it's just with death you don't wake up.
Three men were going for a drive through the desert. An hour later, the car breaks down. They all take something from the car to keep themselves cool as they walk to the nearest gas station a few miles back.
One guy grabs a hand-held fan. Another guy grabs the jug of water. The last guy takes the car door off. About 15 minutes into walking, the other two are giving the one guy weird looks. Finally, one of them asks why he is taking the car door. The third guy just replies that whenever he gets hot he can just roll down the window.
My grandpa was in 9/11. He was the best pilot.
What’s an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.