Worst Jokes Ever
"Jack Sparrow."
"Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow!"
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?
Hot wheels.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your mom gay, And so are you.
This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."
There’s a woman cutting onions when her husband walks in and starts crying. Onions was a good dog.
What do cannibals call a wheelchair user?
"Uber Eats."
I made a page for this orphan, but sadly it didn’t have a homepage.
"What do you tell a person with depression?
Just hang in there, buddy!"
You should always wash your sex toys. That's why priests baptize babies.
Why do an emo's parents not let them cook, because they are afraid they will cut themselves?
Why do orphans eat their breakfast with water?
Because their dad didn't come back with the milk.
On my 21st Birthday, my mom told me, "I got a nice birthday present for you. As the son and only child, you're going to get something good, something you've been looking forward to," is what my mom said.
Me, my mom, and my only friend celebrated my Birthday, then we all went to sleep. I woke up the next day. I asked, "Hey, where's my gift you said you got me?" My mom said, "Since your father left us, you have no father figure in your life, so this is your new stepfather." The only thing is, it was my only friend.
Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
Stephen Hawking prefers rolls to slices of bread.
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
A kindergarten teacher was telling a story...
A kindergarten teacher was telling a story about a farmer walking around the farm talking to the animals. She was trying to get the kids to interact, speak up, and to use their imaginations.
"Mister Farmer stopped at the cow, and the cow said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Susie, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Susie says "He said 'Good morning Mrs. Cow!'"
"Mister Farmer stopped at the pig next, and the pig said 'Good morning, Mister Farmer!'. Johnny, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Johnny says "He said 'Good morning Mr. Pig!'"
"Mister Farmer stopped at the chicken, and the Chicken said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Billy, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Billy says "The farmer said 'Holy shit, that chicken is fucking talking!'"
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
Whoever stole my anti-depression medications, I hope you're happy!
You’re so fat; if you go outside now, you’d be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines.