Worst Jokes Ever
Your hairline goes further back than your mum's divorce.
I might slide up to your block with intelligence. I'm a genius with a glock. There's some relevance. Took his chain, took his rocks. Took his sediments. There's no cap inside my speech. No impediments.
Putting numbers on the board, I use my calculator. Put a opp below the floor, he's a denominator. E = mc2, you didn't notice that? Had the shot, but he's too scared. Why didn't he buss it back?
Imagine this: You're at math class. The teacher asks you, "What's 11 * 11?" You say, "120." The teacher says, "Wrong!" You say, "How off was I?" The teacher says, "1."
Me rn: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHERES THE RAGE TABLE or something like that.
Why did the child cross the road?
Because he didn’t wear a seatbelt.
There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.
What do you call a guy named Kaiden?
I don't know, lol.
Why'd the emo have no friends?
"Because they like to hang by themself."
What do blind people and an orphan have in common? Both can't see their parents.
What is the difference between E.T. and an orphan?
E.T. can actually call home.
What do super fancy music conductors wear?
A Louis baton.
I like my wine like my women:
16 and in my basement.
Why do orphans hate hide and seek?
Their parents went to play hide and seek years ago.
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.
Yo mama so fat that she was the float in the Thanksgiving Day Parade with Kermit the Frog!
If I slap an orphan, what will it do, tell its parents? 🤣😂🤣😂
Why did the orphan become a stripper?
To have someone to call "daddy!"
Roses are red, violets are bl-- oh yeah, I'm bad at jokes.
My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."