Worst Jokes Ever
What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but couldn't stand up?
What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?
An AK-46.
Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Oh wait...
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Doctor: “I have good and bad news.”
Patient: “Give me the good news first.”
Doctor: “Your test results are back and you have only two days to live.”
Patient: “That’s the good news? What’s the bad news?”
Doctor: “I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
My dad died during 9/11, he was the best pilot in all Saudi Arabia.
How to surprise a blind man: put a plunger in the toilet!
My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke, and I burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand-up comedian.
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
Yo mama so dumb, she thought "The Squid Game" was an all-you-can-eat buffet.
What did the calculator say to the student?
You can always count on me.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
Q: What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?
A: The abortion clinic doesn't deliver.
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie one shoe.
Me: Roasts my annoying cousin.
Everyone at the barbecue...
Yo hairline so far back, it goes back to Jesus on the cross!
I'm a cheetah, I cheat, duh?
What do you call a fat Indian that is actually a machine?
The "curry muncher 2000."
Your lips are so big, it turns the Grand Canyon sideways.