Worst Jokes Ever
I looked in the mirror yesterday. I still have nightmares...
Why are washers better than babies?
Washers don't cry when you put a load in them.
Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
I have an orphan joke, but it needs parental guidance.
Your forehead is so big, it's a $20 taxi ride from your hairline to your eyebrows.
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."
What's long and black? The line at KFC.
What do you call a gay barbecue?
LGTBBQ.
Why do we not have female magicians? Because last time we had them, we burned them alive.
I got kicked out of a library because I put a book about women's rights into the fantasy section.
Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC.
Why aren't orphans good at Monopoly?
They don't know what a house is.
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hair dryer.
I only have 4 moods:
• fuck this • fuck that • fuck me • fuck you
I empathize with the above, but I have an additional 4 moods to add:
• fuck yeah • fuck no • fuck my life • fuck everything
and don't forget the inevitable
• fuck it
and for those who have just given up
• fuck
This is beautiful.
I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got excited and asked if I could drive a plane.
JFK: Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.
Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and feel better.
Like this if you laughed.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!