Told jokes
Like this if you laughed.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!
Location is in London by the way.
One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money.
His friend: "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"
I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.
A blind woman told me I had a big penis yesterday.
I think she was pulling my leg.
Guess what song this is from:
"I'll cut you into little bitty pieces,
Or freeze you till your blood runs cold,
Or stab your till' you heart stops pumping.
I'm here to realize your wish from what I'm told."
My friend said he wanted to die, and I told him not to jump. But when he screamed, "Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to Jackass!" I knew it was over.
My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all, and if I could borrow it.
My friend told me to "hang on" when I told him I wanted to kill myself.
Buddy, I’ll be hanging for sure, just you wait.
I told my mum the refrigerator was running, so she got dressed and ran after it...
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms?
Because he told the man to put his hands up.
My dad always told me I should sing tenor. Ten or twelve miles away.
I was always poked and told at weddings your next...
So I went to funerals and poked them and said your next.....
I wanted to be an astronaut, but my parents always told me when I was little that the sky was the limit.
My dad told me he only drinks on days that start with a "T":
Tuesday, Thursday, today, tomorrow.
My girlfriend told me women are better at multitasking than men. So I told her to sit down and shut up. Guess what...
She couldn't do either!
My grandpa told me I was too dependent on devices. I told him he was a hypocrite and unplugged him from his life support.
My mom wanted me to build her a shed for her useless things, then she told me to go live in it.
Your mum is so old that when I told her to act her age, she died.
I told a crippled guy he is immortal because he can't kick the bucket.
Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."
Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"