This jokes
Bin Laden’s kid comes sad from school.
“Dad, I got an F in Geography class!”
“Why is that?”
“The teacher asked me what’s the tallest building in New York and I said ‘Empire State Building.’”
Bin Laden waits a moment and then replies, “Let dad handle this one.”
This bitch got mad at me because I couldn’t last four strokes. What the fuck are you mad at me for? My grandpa didn’t even survive one.
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.
This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!
Riddler: Riddle me this, are you scared of the big black?
Person: Big black what?
Riddler: ...
Person: I'm scared of what you mean because you won't tell me what you mean.
A Person that puts a RickRoll in a book is actually the hero we all needed...
Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"
Yep, this happens when you play G.T.A., good God!
Mmmm, bread. I love Panera Bread.
This is unrelated, but where I live, there is no Panera Bread. Y'know what that's called?
No Panera Bread.
Did you make your bed this morning? Wanna unmake it together?
One time a blind person grabbed my arm thinking it was something else.
"Oh wow, this is such an interesting book!"
Beautiful people should read this quote: "God gave you beauty but not brains."
Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"
The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"
Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."
I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”
– Rodney Dangerfield
Found this girl in Hawaii.
Put a stick up her ass and she said, "Ayi."
What do you call a depressed person's life?
At this point, nonexistent.
This Native American won't stop talking bad about me, so I said, "Please stop acting like you first discovered this land belonged to your ancestors!"
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”
“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”
My brother apparently has this thing called "asthma". Anyway, I took his vape away today, and he was lying on the floor gasping for air, lol. He must really be addicted to it.
Wow, my own joke. Category: I problem won’t remember this.