This jokes

This is why they don't want to sell the Double Manhattan in pubs anymore.

Hi, I'm new to this website, please follow.

Damn, didn't know this site was about Harry Pot-

This dick ain't gon to suck itself.

<😏__ \ 👇 \ _/ 🍆\_

This will happen in your future, though, now because you're mean.

Hey Gwen... I had a friend named Gwen in preschool.

The preschool was Cascade Christian and in Washington (which is close to Oregon. I read in a chat that you live there.) This is a long shot, but I think you might be the same Gwen. If not, ok.

I made this one up myself just now.

Stephen Hawking would be a good pilot because the aircraft would be the first to take off and land in autopilot.

Yo momma is so dumb that she couldn't even get three words into this joke. Maybe that's why she gave it a thumb's down...

Hi, I'm Claire. I am new to this website. I have been seeing these "Legends," and I've been tracking one specifically, watersharky. I have questions about him. Is he nice, protective, single? If anyone has any more information about him, please tell me.

Roses are red, I like burgers on a bun.

This news: family neuters furry son.

I will give you all the fine chicks you want. Just dial this number: 313-974- tap that ass from Hooters strip club.

Me: Says to kid at adoption center, "You're adopted!"

Me and kid: hug.

Thought this site needed a little bit of nice jokes.

What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?

This is a pig problem!

I was running away from expired grocery items with my friend, when I got out I noticed he was left for bread. I felt so guilty, he was toast. I'm not loafing this.

Stormtrooper: My lord, what should we do with all this beef?

Palpatine: Stew it.

Read this:

Crack

What did you think of? A window crack or the drug?

So this guy thought he was funny by pissing on the floor and not in the urinal.

Later on, I guess some kid ran into the bathroom because, well, he probably had to go, but yeah, he slipped and fell and hit his head on the urinal, so all in all it was a pretty good prank on his part.

A man gets arrested after writing "MORBID JOKES COMING OUT THIS TIME NEXT YEAR!" and "I'm gay!"

Why did the liberal cross the road?

(Ah, fuck this shit, I'm gonna kill myself!)

Jesus got rejected. A few years later he died. He came back just to lose his virginity because even Jesus is not a fucking cunt.

Get off this site and go have some sex, you fucking virgins.