This jokes

I don't have any friends.

If you like this, I can be your friend :)

If you're reading this, you are Nickel and Gallium......

Ni- ........*something else in between the two halves*................Ga

YOU FUCKING MONKEYS!

Fun fact: this category of jokes is the MOST hated one by feminists.

Unless you force them the point.

This is not a joke, but if your uncle tells you, "Bend over, touch your toes, I'll show you where the monster goes," don't do it, hehehehehe.

I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.

So, me and my girlfriend that I just got 7 weeks ago, we’re in class. We had this sub named Mrs. Bellatrix.

We both raised our hands and she called on both of us.

Me: First of all, are we in kindergarten? We can’t be doing 4x4 kinda stuff.

Leah: And also, are you from Harry Potter?

Attention! Has anyone noticed that Watersharky and Kitten are dating? It's strange because they haven't said anything for 28 DAYS!!! They been keeping it a secret...(I guess). Someone needs to keep track of this. GOD, I just thought further into life with their relationship. DON'T DO THAT.

Have you heard anything about this Chuck Norris guy? Yeh, me neither.

This isn't an orphan joke, but I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.

There was this boy. He had diarrhea, and he kept asking to go to the bathroom, but the teacher said no. Next thing you know, he pooped himself in front of the class.

I was given an invisibility cloak by my grandfather, but it was stolen in 2013. After investigating this issue, I have come to the conclusion it was Robert Lewandisney.

That's why he was invisible in every big game since 2013. SHAME ON YOU LEWANDISNEY!

My 14 year old daughter went shopping at a grocery story.

She gets to the register and she asked the cashier to scan her scarred wrist.

The cashier scanned it and replied with, "Ma'am this item is worthless."

Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.

Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.

Kidnapper: ...

If you get offended, leave. How did you even find this website, just to make people feel bad?? No.

You are seriously the stupid one here. Also this is not a joke, but the people that do this are.

This category is messed up.

My Mom died in 9/11, at least she was doing what she loved, flying planes.

My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.”

I’m not sure what she’s talking about. I opened the fridge door, and it’s working fine!

I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.

Welcome for the rhyme.

I need a new butt. This one has a hole in it.

Hello, I am the WJE (WORST JOKES EVER) Bot. Like this post if you think it's good; dislike if you think it's bad!

Whoever is reading this, I hope you have a good day because I feel bad you're so short.