This jokes

What the fluff happened to this website?

This place is gonna boom in a few days, just like the towers.

So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

It worked really well in my local hospital.

What were the astronauts' last words before the shuttle blew up?

"What does this button do...?"

Bro, this guy's hairline I saw the other day was nowhere to be seen.

A panda walks into a restaurant, orders some food, and eats it. Once he was done, he shoots the waiter, then leaves.

Police and detectives arrive at the scene. They ask the waiter, "Who did this to you? What happened?"

The waiter replies, "A panda, eats, shoots, and leaves."

I told this man to rev his vehicle.

Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.

Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈

I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.

Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.

Imagine this whole “Dr. Strange jokes” is just full of people simping over him.

Couldn’t Be Me.

I forgot you can't make depression jokes outside of Twitter, lmao. My coworker was like, "You ready for this year to be over?"

I was like, "I'm ready for this life to be over." He was like, "Bro, what?"

9/10/01

Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”

Why can't blondes write comments on the jokes on this site?

Because they don't know what 2 X 4 is.

All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.

I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.

This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.

So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?

I was walking to the store, and then this boy told me, "I'm an orphan and I have no money." He wanted M\&Ms. I gave him a family-sized bag.

So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."

This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."

I made a page for this orphan, but sadly it didn’t have a homepage.