Think jokes

I bought a silencer for my gun, but I don't think it works.

My victims still scream.

What's thick, long, hard, and has cum in it?

Cucumber. Lol. I love the way you think.

I wrote a few jokes:

What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off.

Yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex. I could not think that her mother is so hot.

What will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast.

Yo mama so hairy that the zookeepers called a code red thinking an ape got loose.

My lesbian friends bought me a nice watch for my birthday. I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch."

"Why can’t you be comfortable with my own body?"

"I think you should ask yourself that."

How do you think Julius Caesar killed his enemies?..

With a pair of Caesars! 😂😂👌

If you think the guy calling you fat is offensive,

Try salad 🥗.

How many people do you think are in a graveyard? Hopefully none.

What do you call a woman who thinks she can do anything a man can do? Wrong.

I don't think I'm allergic to this.

This is the song we all misunderstood: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2S0QhGGO1gQ

"He said, "One day, you'll leave this world behind, so live a life you will remember." My father told me when I was just a child, "These are the nights that never die." My father told me."

Whenever I think about it deeply, it makes me wanna cry :(

The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!

I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag.

OK, I'm joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.

You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.

Friend: I must order more nuts.

Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.

I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!

In the hospital, I saw a girl with cancer trying to sleep. The ICU was going beep beep beep. I think that's why she can't sleep, so I turned it off. She's asleep forever now. Nighty night.

I think you're eggcellent!

This morning, I was having a conversation with my ex-boyfriend about reincarnation. I said to him, "If you could come back in the next life as anything, what would you come back as?" He thought about it for a minute and says, "A tree. That way, everybody can look at me and admire me."

Then he says the same thing to me. I started thinking about it when these two sexy, half-naked studs walked by. One was a jock, the other on his bicycle. I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat, but knowing my luck, I'll come back as a tampon.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.

I would tell you a joke about a slice of pizza, but it's really... cheesy. I donut think you will come up with a better pun than this.