What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?
When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.
I used to have a phobia of pogo-sticks. Those things always made me jump.
why do orphans pick apples because thats the only thing they can pick
What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?
A full house
Do you know that “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” usually mean the same thing? Except at a funeral.
If iI don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights wont be the only thing hanging from the roof
What a upside to being an orphan There's things called family size bags
Why is a blind people bad at catching things because they never see it coming
when hotline bling i only need one thing
Can u imagine what was the last thing that went through there brains
The knee caps
what thing can an Orphan do beast. Stay at home alone
You know what's the difference between my basement and Chick Fil-A?
a lot of things
Q:What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said to Courtney love before he died? A: “holes gonna be big”
The tables Im my class are strait but I can’t say the same thing for you’re hairline
Love is a good thing, never be embarrassed by it.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common. My sister tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child*
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing? Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one." The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
