Thing jokes
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back.
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Som Ting Wong.
What's the opposite of an exorcism?
When Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child...
What is the only thing lesbians know how to grow? Cucumbers.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home ;)
Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.
Memes
I can now cross it off my bucket list
"What's 9 + 10?"
"21" (lol XD)
Also:
"My name Jeff" (Roar XD)
One more thing:
Ninja has ligma.
Life is a bitch, and people make it worse.
This thing that I'm in ("am") is a forsaken curse (beta).
I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."
This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.
A lot of things changed when I got my girlfriend pregnant: my name, my address, and my phone number.
The Twin Towers traded planes with Afghanistan. The only thing is Afghanistan got scammed.
When someone throws something at your forehead, it stops moving and goes into orbit around your forehead.
I'm sorry and I apologize mean the same thing, except at a funeral.
You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!
Friend: How's it going?
Me: Good, things are good!
Parent: How are you?
Me: Oh, I'm fine!
Twitter: Compose new tweet?
Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.
Why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? Because they had no one to pick them up.
What's an orphan's best friend? A boomerang because it's the only thing that ever came back.
One thing led to another, now I have a new patio.
Two emos are dating, and the most romantic thing they have ever done is slit each other's wrists.
I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.
It didn't work.
Why is my sister so annoying? Because put your own thing in.