How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove box.
They Jokes
Once the aliens was gonna have a party, they had to planet.
Haven’t they switched him off and then back on yet?
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
I aced my poker test...
My teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...
A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffin...
Do you get my puns? No, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims – they went 89 stories in ten seconds.
When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.
Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.
The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.
The guys show up and the guards shoot them.
The guys die because the guards used real guns.
Orphan jokes are just hurtful, and that is all they are, so please stop.
Why do people have sex?
Because they like going "Ahhhhhhhhhhh fuck me, bitch, I love you!"
I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.
I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.
The 11th of September is considered 9/11 in America. The Twin Towers fell on 9/11 in 2001, but to call an emergency in America, you dial 911! 😮 You could say they dialed that correctly.
Why can’t dinosaurs clap? Cuz they are all dead.
Why can't orphans play poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Q: What do bloods eat when they get sick?
A: Chicken noodle suwoop.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza but it came plain.
Q: Why can't you tell 9/11 jokes in a comedy club?
A: They always crash and burn.
Why can't New York City play chess?
Because they lost 2 towers!
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because they can't find home.
