Thereness jokes

Hand

8 views ·

There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.

Gay

100 views ·

What do gay guys and priests have in common?

They are both gay in their own ways.

Kid

27 views ·

Once there was this kid that wanted to shower with his dad, so his dad said yes. Then he asked, "What is that?" and his dad said it's a chow chow train.

The next day, he wanted to shower with his mom, so she said yes. He asked again, "What is that?" and she said it was a tunnel with light.

The same day, he wanted to sleep with them, and they said yes.

In the middle of the night, he woke up and told his mom to turn on the light because the chow chow train is going in.

Family

1 view ·

There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.

Baby

7 views ·

I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.

Bean

1 view ·

How many beans are there in Irish chili?

Answer: 239

Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?

Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."

Orphan

37 views ·

Why is the orphan happy when he wakes up from a coma?

Because there is a family reunion.

People

2 views ·

Has anybody else noticed that out of nowhere there are always tons of people online? It's kinda trippy if I'm being honest.

Cyclist

Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"

The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."

Cheetah

6 views ·

Why do cheetahs have spots outside of their bodies?

Because they don't have them on the inside.

Plastic

142 views ·

What do lesbians and turtles have in common?

They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)

Prank

1 view ·

"Thank God there are no of these ahahha ya thank God to pranks."

"Oh I forgot a dance 🕺 😅 joke is good ok for kids."