Thereness jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Pencil.
Pencil who?
Oh, never mind, it's pointless.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
There is a twist with being an orphan: every bag of chips is family sized.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Anita.
Anita who?
Anita poo let me in!
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
When it's April Fool's Day, go to an orphan and say, "Their parents should come back!"
There was once a kid named Timmy. His father and mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them.
They all get under the covers. Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood-curdling scream. "MOMMY, WATCH OUT! THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY, I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his father's penis in his mouth and chomps down.
Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.
Why can’t orphans play baseball??
Because they can’t find their way to home plate.
Look, I didn't hit rock bottom. I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.
I went to the orphans to paint a picture of their parents so they can actually talk to them.
How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.
Friend 1: What's the most disappointing thing that ever happened to you? For me, repeating a year.
Friend 2: Failing an important test. And you?
Then there is me: My life.
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger-licking good.
So, there was this cop on the top bunk of a bunk bed.
Another cop walks in and sits on the bottom bunk and the cop on the top bunk bed said, "You're under a-rest."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To get to the gay kid's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
A kid just becomes an orphan, well, I guess it's better than being a hobo.
I heard there is a zozo hobo who eats all your Pringles.
If you're mad, hire an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents? 🤣🤣
There is a really, really small guy and his name is Adam, so I say, "Hey, look, it's an atom!"
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.
Why was there a box in a church? Because there was a funeral.