Technology jokes
Do emo kids get jealous of their phone when it dies?
How does a tree access the internet?
By logging in and branching out!
Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.
If Stephen Hawking was in a horror movie, would he make his robot try and shout, "Aaaaaaaah! Help me, I can't move! I'm too scared!"?
What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"
When you step on the weighing scale, it shows your phone number!
Why was the computer late to work?
Because it had a hard drive!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his son wanted to charge their phone, so they unplugged him.
I just got a text on my cell. Bone be right back ;)
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
I don’t know what’s worse: Finding bucket loads of porn on my dad’s laptop, or finding out he was in all of them.
What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die.
What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.
You're so ugly, even a Snapchat filter can't fix it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
QoS.
QoS who?
QoS there me me who me and you.
I’m reading a book on antigravity right now.
It’s impossible to put down.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
Boo Boo Doo.
Hi, I did not text back to text her and dad, now I’m texting her. Now I’m.
Say this when showing this website to someone: "You know, it's too bad this website doesn't have a homepage."
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His Windows update wasn't available.
Why can't an orphan have a website?
... No homepage.