Technology jokes

Stephen Hawking died because his WiFi ran out.

Have they tried switching him off and on again?

Why did he die?

Because God made a mistake and pressed Ctrl+Z.

What makes it cold in a room? Air conditioning.

Q: Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to the countryside?

A: There’s no signal.

Michael Jackson is like a TV from the 1900s: black and white.

I met a man named Jebidiah on Xbox Live.

How did Stephen Hawking die? He lost internet connection.

What does a robot do after a one night stand?

He nuts 'n bolts!

Did you hear how Stephen Hawking died?

There was a mix up, and he was dropped at PC World instead of A&E!

What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...

They're both plastic and kids turn them on.

My cousin: Brother, I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile; however, I left it as it is].

Me: So tell me about it then.

My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi.

Me: Somebody? Don’t they have, like, the name of you opponents?

My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I.

Me: Ok, my bad. Continue.

My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi, and 5 seconds later, I got kill[ed] by Sum_Fing_Wong.

Me: It’s not wrong! In Call of Duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed.

My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G.

Me: My bad again. Do continue.

My cousin: I got so angry I blow[ed] up.

Me: So you got blowed up, by what weapon?

My cousin: By the game.

Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]

A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini.

The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that.

"New around here?" said the bartender.

"Nah, been here a while," said the robot.

Bartender "You can talk?"

Robot "Yeah, pretty cool, huh."

Bartender "Why do you want a martini?"

Robot "Oh, I'm just in the mood for one, you know?"

The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk.

The robot seems to be just like a normal human.

"Wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender.

"The top minds in the world," said the robot.

The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..."

Bartender, "What?"

"Why did you read this entire story? It does not have a punchline. I just wasted your time. Get bamboozled, nerd!"

Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her last year, and it is still printing.

Two wind turbines are standing in a field.

One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"

The other says, "Well... I'm a huge metal fan..."

I heard he's doing a revival tour next month. It's called "Stephen Hawking Unplugged."

Guess Stephen Hawking never had use for sweatcoin😂

Johny Sin's son checked his father's folder of p*rn in his laptop.

and found that in all the videos his father is...

39, 41, 43, AK, 47... AK-47.

1, 3, 5, M, 9... M-9.

Why does Stephen Hawking have the voice of an angel?

Because no one has ever heard an angel talk.