Technology jokes
I was submitting this joke, and I realized Stephen Hawking couldn't.
It had the reCAPTCHA "I'm not a robot."
An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"
I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."
Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?
I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...
My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.
Memes
Yo mama's so dumb, she trips over the wireless internet.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.
Why download Fruit Ninja when you have your arm?
Your mamma is so dumb, she went to the dentist to get Bluetooth.
Stephen Hawking died because his WiFi ran out.
Why did he die?
Because God made a mistake and pressed Ctrl+Z.
Have they tried switching him off and on again?
Why can't an orphan watch T.V.?
Because it can't find the home button.
Q: Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to the countryside?
A: There’s no signal.
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
No wonder some of the phones today have no home buttons.
The makers were orphans.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite place in Fortnite? The reboot van.
Guy: Fight me on Xbox. Guy: Oh right, you don't have one *laughs*
Me: Fight me in real life. Me: Oh right, you don't have a real life. *INSERTS APPLE BOTTOM JEANS*
2021-2022
So, every time I walk in the door, my kid shuts his laptop. So, I check his history. It was good, but my wife checked mine, and she didn't say the same. The words I heard were, "Get out!"
What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?
An AK-46.