Technology jokes

Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.

Yo mama so fat, when she talks to herself, it’s a long-distance call.

Remember 2000? It was scary.

I ask the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.

Yesterday I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home.

NASA stands for... National Adult S3x Association.

Why does an orphan hate the internet?

Because he's always on the homepage.

I wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor. I need some parts for my laptop.

Why can't an orphan have an iPad?

They can't find the home button.

Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.

Why can't orphans exit out of their games? They don't have a home button.

What do you call a person that can't operate a wheelchair?

Stephen Hawking.

Why can't an orphan use an Apple iPad?

Because it can't find the home button...

When we told Twin Towers to put on airplane mode, we didn't mean a real airplane.

Why are orphans sad when playing Roblox?

There isn't any parents on Roblox.

My girlfriend sent “a let’s break up text” right when I was done editing our pics.

My cousin’s friend spelled “racist” wrong and when my cousin showed me, the first thing I said to my cousin’s friend is “Go to Grammarly. They REALLY teach you spelling.”

I told this man to rev his vehicle.

Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.

Isn't there a software company named after your dick?

Microsoft?

What did the blond say about the new iPhone?

Krabby Patty jizz sandwich.