Technology jokes
I used to be a fan, but after seeing her OnlyFans account, I'm a whole air conditioner.
Why can't an orphan have a phone?
Because they will see a home.
When your mum tells you to help your granny.
And you unplug life support!
Why does an orphan have an iPhone X?
Because they have no home button.
Why do orphans hate the internet?
Because on the internet, people have families.
Why was the computer late to work?
Because it had a hard drive!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
QoS.
QoS who?
QoS there me me who me and you.
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
Why do orphans like the iPhone 12 Pro?
Because there is no home button.
There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.
Why do orphans want an iPhone S? Because it has a home screen.
What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?
They both make a sound at the end.
What type of clock is both cringe and an app?
TikTok.
Why did the robot eat a lightbulb?
'Cause he was in need of a light snack!
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
Do you know what organ remains warm even after a woman dies?
My penis (or rather my neutron laser priming its firing sequence).
How do you call an American bee?
USB.
"Room, you on."
Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"
What do you call a pornography version of TikTok?
Dik Cok (dick cock)