Team jokes
Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad!
- 0 tapins! - 0 assists! - 3/3 dives! - 0 key passes! - 2 big chances missed! - 1/4 dribbles! - 2 Offsides! - 27 claps!
Better than Elanga?
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
He doesn’t know where home is.
In the new Justice League movie, Flash can break glass by touching it, why is that?
Because Flash is not supported on Windows.
Why can't an orphan win a baseball game?
Because they can't reach home.
Fuck the Green Bay Packers!
Time for double joke Tuesday.
What is a bird's favorite letter?
A C gull.
So I won a round of CSGO with my team, then on VC, some kid trash talked me.
Kid: You're a dick, you know!
Me: And you're a pussy, you know?
What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?
They both fall in September.
What is it called if you give 100 disabled people guns?
Special Forces.
Why do orphans miss half their basketball season? Cause they don't have home games.
What helped the Lakers win the Finals? Kobe's passing!
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite football team? New York Jets!!!
What's Momma bear's favorite baseball team? The Cubs.
When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”
In America, there was a boy named Urhan, and he had one hand and a stump, and a girl named Handa who was an orphan. They had a trial for the Boston Red Sox, and they failed because Urhan couldn’t stump the ball, and Handa didn’t know where home was.
Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!"
Soldier: "Let's clear the field!"
Officer: "Ok!"
*silence*
*explosion*
What do you call a kid on the track team who isn't on the track team?
A school shooter.
Why couldn't the orphanage win the baseball game?
Answer: They couldn't find home base.
So the coach got mad at me because I'm the only one on my team who is only a bit on the spectrum, and I was just keeping the ball to myself. The coach pulled me aside and said, "Pass to others." I said, "Why?" And he said, "There's no 'I' in 'team.'" I said, "Yeah, but there's an 'm' and an 'e.'"