Team

Team jokes

Baseball

At baseball practice...

"Hey John, did you bring the bucket of balls?"

"No, but I got two right here."

Penaldo

I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!

Mexico

Why does Mexico not have a good athletics team? Because anyone who can run or jump is already over the wall.

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  • Peter

    Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?

    Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.

    Susie

    Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!

    Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!

    Human

    How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?

    Turn on the gas chamber.

    Teacher

    A teacher in Scunthorpe asks a class what their favorite football team is, saying, "Raise your hand if it is Scunthorpe." Every student but one raised their hand. The teacher asks, "Why don't you support Scunthorpe?" The child answers, "My parents support Grimsby, and so do I." The teacher comes back with, "Why are you copying your parents? What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad a druggie?" The child answers, "Then I'd support Scunthorpe like you dirty bastards!"

    Orphan

    Why does an orphan always get out in baseball?

    Because he can't run home.

    Penaldo

    Official Dj Penaldo playlist.

    1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"

    Coach

    So the coach got mad at me because I'm the only one on my team who is only a bit on the spectrum, and I was just keeping the ball to myself. The coach pulled me aside and said, "Pass to others." I said, "Why?" And he said, "There's no 'I' in 'team.'" I said, "Yeah, but there's an 'm' and an 'e.'"

    School Shooter

    When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”