Teacher Jokes

Teacher told me to turn in my essay but I ain't no snitch fool

why did the chicken cross the road? he had to finish his essay or the teacher was gunna whoop his fat butt cheeks

I got sent to the principal office today because I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and screamed, “HOTWHEELS!”

Ms Smith: Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze, and I would stay like that. Little Johnny: Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned.

Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah) Student: How should I know, that's his story 🤷‍♀️

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

At school in a classroom, the teacher asked the kid “If you have one dollar and your parents give you 5 dollar how much do you have?” Everyone one raised their hand except one little girl.

I told my brother If he wanted to have a Wonderful first day of school then he should put cook book in the women’s sports section at the school library.

A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question, can go home." A boy throws his bag out the window.

The teacher asks, “Who just threw that?”

The boy says, “Me! I’m going home now.”

Kid: What is an orphans favorite breakfast? Teacher: What? Kid: Fruity pebble with water Teacher: Why water? Kid: Cause it's dad never came back with the milk

I’m enyaw and I fancy my pe teacher she is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank I always watch her bc I am a creep I live at school under the stairs but I also try follow her home and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door

A teacher wanted to teach her students about self-esteem, so she asked anyone who thought they were stupid to stand up. One kid stood up and the teacher was surprised. She didn’t think anyone would stand up so she asked him, “Why did you stand up?” He answered, “I didn’t want to leave you standing up by yourself.”

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

In kindergarten we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words. Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit"

One day little Jonnys is in class it is the second day back to school. The teacher is annoyed with the kids so she goes to the front of the class and says, "If you think you are stupid stand up." lIttle Jonny stood up. The teacher asked him why do you think you're stupid. Little Jonny said I don't think I am stupid. Then the teacher asked little Jonny why he stood up. Then little Jonny replied I just felt bad seeing you standing here alone.