Teacher jokes

I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:

P. P. P. P. U. U. U. U. N. N. N. N. S. S. S. S.

Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common.

“They are all very tearable,” he replied.

Well, there is one person who gets it!

My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"

I said, "Paper."

She said, "Really?"

I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"

A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.

Student: Hey! Did you hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?

Teacher: No?

Student: All I can say about it is, "Well, well, well."

Teacher: Don’t run into the road!

Down syndrome: Weeeeee!

Teacher: Lol, now he’s a mashed potato.

What do you call a white kid at the back of class?

A school shooter.

I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.

Why did the cheetah get in trouble at school?

Because he cheated on a test.

Child: Mom, someone told me you talk like an owl.

Teacher: Who?

Child: Oh, it is true, you do talk like an owl!

What do you call Greg in your class? Obese.

I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.

Boy: Can I go to the bathroom?

Teacher: If you sing the ABCs.

Boy: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNORSTUVWXYZ!

Teacher: Where’s the P?

Boy: In my pants! Lol. That’s all mates! Have a good day! (Or night)

VOTING FINAL This vote is for the best School Shooter joke of the month.

LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up.

DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke and the Joke of the Month will be announced in the comments tomorrow.

The bell rings, and Ana was about to leave, but the teacher said, "The bell doesn't dismiss you, I do."

The next day, Ana was late, and the teacher asked, "Why are you late?" Ana replied with, "The bell doesn't tell me when I should arrive, I do."

At school in a classroom, the teacher asked the kid, “If you have one dollar and your parents give you five dollars, how much do you have?” Everyone raised their hand except one little girl.

Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.

Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

Our teacher told us to write a story about the life of an object that's not alive, so I wrote a story about an emo kid.

What do teachers eat? They eat square stuff.