System

System jokes

System memes

Orphan

    • What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system?

    Motherboard.

  • 1

    • Potato

    • If I eat a poisonous potato, it attacks my immune system and I die.

    But if I poison a poisonous potato, then eat it, then I won't die because the potato is already dead and can't attack my immune system.

  • 0

    • Invasion

    • Shit, if somebody invades America, the Crips and the Bloods are gonna call a truce so that they can get the big toys out and call Geneva achievement. White women would ride into battle riding lions, tigers, and bears while claymore-strapped rhumbas swept the streets. There's a reason Putin keeps threatening to boom boom us with the boom booms and make you see x-rays before you go go.

    We have freaking cannibals still. Hell, we have more guns than people. Dodging bullets has become a rite of passage. Just look at how we raise our kids on caffeine and M16s playing Call of Duty. Then we send them into the warzone known as the American public education system with no weapons. No means to protect themselves other than with their fists. Here Timmy, fight off the bullets with your bare fist and hope you can zig-zag. Hell, the quiet kids in this country start dropping bodies just cause you teased them. The fuck you think's gonna happen when Timmy can't get his damn chicken nuggets and you took his internet out?

    Hell, the gangs in America would no longer make their money off the drugs illegally. They'd be our medics and taking bets on kill shots. Don't even get me started on the unhinged millennials the moment they can't get their mood stabilizers. War crimes would become an art form and we'd run around like we playing Pokemon. GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL! Americans would turn war crimes into an extreme sport while the military stands back and records it just so they can show the rest of the world the example of why not to fuck with us. Shit, Geneva Convention would turn into a to-do list on every American household fridge. We take that shit so seriously we'd have Comedy Central sending Kevin Hart to tell us rules for engagement. Racism in America would be single-handedly by ended as Billy Bob and Tyrone high five because they think they just unlocked the super secret duck hunt level with foreign paratroopers. Shit somebody please threaten us with a good time. Invade the United States. Let us show you why the first color in our flag is red.

    Bit

    • Right, the bit as the bottom... i mean, look i keep myslef open on systems to rule empires and shit should i ever need to be it.

    A drawing of a hydra with multiple heads. The text on the image reads: "Hydra System. The Hydra is simple, every 2 represents a 1. When a head is cut, its twin must lead the next 2 novice heads. This means when every weak point is exercised the weak spot is a new offense. The perfect system."
  • 0
    • System memes

    Community talk

    • Actually, Alain, while humans are capable of cruelty, selfishness, and betrayal, judging the entire species by its worst behavior overlooks the amazing qualities that humans also possess. Unlike dogs, humans have the capacity for complex reasoning, self-sacrifice, creativity, and empathy that go far beyond instinct. People have built hospitals, created systems of justice, rescued strangers in times of disaster, and devoted their lives to helping others they may never even meet again. Human intelligence is not proven by perfection, but by the ability to reflect, grow, and consciously choose compassion despite flaws and conflicting desires.

    Community