Suicide Jokes

What's the difference between an orgy and mass suicide? When exactly my cult members drink the Kool aid

If iI don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights wont be the only thing hanging from the roof

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I’m going to reenact the ending of Saw (2004), except I won’t stand up and shut the door.

What is the last thing that goes through a suicide bombers mind? His arse.

A boy tried to give a tree a high-five but instead, he ended up hanging

so there was a reason why I hated math I suck at proplem solving

thanks to the voice who keeps telling to let go he is my only motivation for trying again

I can't believe the suicide hotline put my cousin on hold. They left him hanging

What's worse than a failed suicide you ask? I fail suicide cuz you forgot to do the dishes and ur parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you not yourself

if you call the number 800-273-8500 in afganistan thay say can you fly a plane

What do suicidal people and apples have in common? They both hang from trees

one day my friend said: i want tacos from Katie's, you? and i said no thanks and she left i never saw her again, today i remember that i saw her name on TV as one of the victems of suicide, then i remember her and I's moto: if i'm dieing you dieing with me you got no chouse, i NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

A man goes to the library to find the best book about committing suicide. So when he asks the librarian, "What's the best book on committing suicide?" The librarian said, "Oh fuck off...you won't bring it back anyway."

Why cant a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw u will be born soon.

me and my suicidal friend are close, so i took him to the mall to treat him. we bought snacks, a new controller for his xbox and a led lights for him room to hopefully brighten his mood. after we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.