Suicide jokes
Where do depressed people go to eat?
Suicide Sonic.
To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.
I'm jealous of my LED lights, 'cause they're hanging from the ceiling and I'm not.
Did the leaf or the emo fall out of the tree? The leaf won. The rope stopped the emo.
When someone tells me to kill myself,
Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.
Me: "Comment if you love yourself and give me a reason."
Friends: comments give reason.
Me: "Notice how I commented nothing."
Day later:
Mom: Let me see your TikTok.
Me: Shows her the video.
Mom: calls suicide.
JK, she just beat me for posting a video on her.
"1v1 me bitch!"
Your nan is gay.
Me: What do you call 4 depressed kids?
My friend: What?
Me: The Suicide Squad.
Why do people not adhere to the corona measures?
Because they hate their lives and want to die.
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?
— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.
Ama is a bitch. I want him to die and kill himself.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
I have depression, and am suicidal. Nobody knows though, let's joke about that lol.
Me telling a depression and suicide joke in front of my friends.
My friends: ........ Oh wait, I don't have any, so nothing to worry about here.
I have a funny joke: my life.
Me telling my parents I'm depressed: my parents, "No, you're just a little stressed and want attention, am I right?" My depression worsening, me: "Yeah, you're totally right mom..." Me in my head making a plan to commit suicide.....
Person 1: You are the dumbest person in the class.
Person 2: Well, you're the second. Maybe, but at least I'm not the dumbest.
Person 2: I know how to fix that!
... Next day person commits suicide...
How do u get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope they hung themself in...