Store jokes

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.

The mother and her daughter went to the store. After they arrived, the daughter looked around and ran off somewhere. The mother realized this and took off looking for her. After a while, she found her tugging on a black man. The mother asked, "What are you doing?" and the daughter replied, "I wan't the chocolate!"

A famous celebrity admitted that she was non-straight, suffered from a rare condition that changed the colour of her skin, did not age well, only wanted to be compensated for her work in the 5th month of each year at her favourite store while laying down:

TO GET FAYE'S WAY, PAY GRAY, GRAY, GAY FAYE WRAY IN MAY AND LAY HER DOWN AT "THE BAY". OK!!!

What is China's favorite restaurant?

The Pet Store.

I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn’t know back-to-school sales had started already!

Robber: This is a robbery, bitch!

Gunsalesman: No u

Elderly man: Can I get a discount, please? I fought in World War 2.

Cashier: Sure!

Elderly man: Danke.

10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!

A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."

And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"

And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"

And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"

And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."

If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.

I bought a gun from Walmart today. I guess they knew what I was going to do with it, because when I pulled the gun on the cashier, I realized the firing mechanism was in reverse.

A fat man coming in the store.

Waiter: Oh god, not again :|

Fat man: Hi, I would like three fries and 19 burgers.

Waiter: Sorry sir, you will get the owner's store out of stock on food. Can I get you a salad instead?

Fat man: Oh sorry, but I'm the owner, and I have a lot of stocks. For the record, you should get yourself my order. You're skinny af, girl. You trying to be a stick or something?

Why did Gwen go to the store? To have a new.

So Stephen Hawking walked into a grocery store.

Never mind.

Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?

He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.

Why can orphans never go to the shops?

'Cause the Talibans will plane dive into them.

Once my dad left to get milk, then I realized we own a cow.

Why are orphans banned from the shop?

No adult to pay for them.

I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”

The man was Indian. He moved to England because he wanted to learn, so got a job at the store. He learned how to say "register," then he was a business man. He learned how to say "59887," then "restaurant," so he learned how to say "fork and knives." So a man came with a knife. The cop came and asked the man which was the killer who killed him. He said, "Him," and pointed to the Indian man. The cop asked, "What did you use?" He said, "Register." The cop asked for ID. "59887." The cop asked, "Anything on you, forks and knife?" He said, "Me me me."