What gang was Stephen Hawking in? The Crips.
Two blondes walk into a bar. I thought one of them would have seen it.
Your mom is so fat, every time she turns around, it's her birthday.
A man goes to a restaurant and asks for some chili.
The waiter said, "Sorry sir, this is an Asian restaurant."
So he stretches his eyes and says, "Oh herro, can I get some chiri?"
What do you call a fat midget?
A pig.
What's two lesbians in a tent?
A finger hut.
A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun.
The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: "Shut up... you're next!"
Man, my Muslim friend's the bomb!
What do you call black people in pool?
Coco Pops.
A drunk walks into a bar and says, "All lawyers are assholes!" A guy at the other end of the bar says, "I resent that!" The drunk says, "Why, are you a lawyer?" and the other guy says, "No, I'm an asshole!"
Q: What has two wings and a halo?
A: An Asian phone call, "Wing, Wing, Halo?"
What do you call a couple Mexicans getting stoned in a bush? Buches baked breans.
Your mom is fat.
Oooo, roasted!
Why did the kid named Jeff become gay? Because he grew up without a father figure. Hahaha, I love dark humor!
You calling me gay, but the pole is straighter than you.
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
Why can't two Chinese people have a white baby? Because "two wongs don't make a white."
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.
Why did Vladimir Putin get bad grades? -- Because he was Russian.
