Sound jokes
I bought a silencer for my gun, but I don't think it works.
My victims still scream.
Those rape alarms give you a headache, don't they?
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Cow says,
"Cow says who?"
No! Cow says moo!
Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds.
One of the kids says something: "Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty?"
The other kid says something else: "Yes. It sounds cool."
After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: "Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over, but I think it's missing something though."
The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking: "Oh, I know what it is!"
After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack.
The first kid speaks: "Icy what you did there."
The other kid replies: "Good thing I didn't slip up there."
The first kid replies: "Well, that's snow problem."
The other kid then uttered this: "These puns would make the most frigid individual crack up."
The first kid then says: "I know, right?"
They then begin a snowball fight.
The other kid then says: "Only the men have snowballs!"
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
"Windows shut down sound."
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"
How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.
Guy 1: P-gay or T-gay?
Guy 2: P-gay sounds cooler.
Guy 1: Yeah me too. I don't like P-ewDiePie, always love T-series.
Guy 2: Omg what did i just say? I wasn't even knowing what were you talking about :<
Guy 1: Like I do care :$
Guy 3: But I do care :<
Guy 1: F*ck you.
Guy 3: Do it.
Guy 2: But you do care about me.
Guy 3: No.
Guy 2: F*ck you.
Guy 3: Do it.
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks.
About a dog.
Stop making jokes about cancer... I might sound like a Karen, but it’s not fair... My mum died of cancer last month, and still I cry nearly every night 🙏🏻
What did Ahsan do?
Meow meow.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Spell.
Spell who?
W. H. O.
How do ducks fart?
Out their butt, quack.
What do you call a train full of gum?
A chew chew train.
What is a tuba plus tuba? -- Fourba.
What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.
What does a Chinese machine gun sound like? "ching chong ching chong tang tang."
What do you call a running chicken?
Scared.