Someone jokes

Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?

Someone turned off flight mode.

(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)

Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?

A: When they are falling from their balcony.

Someone in the Twin Towers ordered two pizzas, plane?

Why do orphans like being criminals?

Because then someone actually wants them.

"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."

Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.

Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."

Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."

To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"

At least someone who is gay/Carter has someone.

When the bully says, "You're adopted," so you hit him with, "At least someone wanted me!"

Why do orphans love going to church?

So they can call someone "father."

If someone says nobody asked, you could say, "Well, nobody asked for you to talk!"

My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot, and then they bombed him. Now he called them the "Talkwakers."

Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"

When someone says you're an orphan, say, "At least I was wanted, unlike you!"

Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"

Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁

I'm bored. Someone wanna chat?

When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"

There was someone who slept late... he missed the dream!

There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?

They left someone for memories!

What’s the only plus for someone who burns to death?

They get a discount at the crematorium.