Someone jokes
If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?
Someone I know is an ant. I feel like a mountain to them.
My wife is so fat. I finally got up the energy to walk around to the other side. I found someone else!
Why was the cookie angry? Because someone ate the chips!
What do you call someone who’s afraid of breaststroke? Chicken breast.
Memes
ITS SO TRUE ONG
What do you call Panera bread when it’s on top of someone?
Panera head.
What do you call someone with a big butt?
The Thightanic!
So there is someone who doesn't know what an armadillo is.
He then sees one. He asks it a question, "What are you?"
The armadillo replies, "Armadillo."
The person says: "What's a dilo?"
What do you call someone who has sex with foals, calves, and lambs? A Quadrupedophile.
What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?
Womxn
Why does the orphan go to church? He needs someone to call father.
Teacher: "If you're dumb, stand up."
Nobody stands up.
After some waiting, the teacher says, "Really? No one? There must be someone."
Little Johnny stands up.
"Oh, so you think you're dumb, Johnny?"
"Nah, I just feel bad that you're standing alone."
"I miss you.
Being happy was never that hard without you..."
Someone's dad: You think he/she wants to join me? I didn't get the milk...
What do you call someone with notorious special needs and an extra chromosome?
The double trouble.
What would an emo say to someone to make them join the EMO side?
A: Go kill yourself!
What do you call someone with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
What do you call an orphan who likes football?
Because someone will actually give him something.
Kindly yeet someone!
"Hey, what does IDK mean?"
"I don't know."
"Okay, then I am going to ask someone else."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
911.
911 who?
You said you would never forget.