Society jokes
What's wrong with Asian pet stores?
There's no pets.
I'm going to burn Braden Mitchell Kniffen's house down.
What’s the difference between candy and an orphan?
Candy is something everybody wants.
In Alabama... How do you know your sister is having periods? Your dad's penis tastes like blood.
You're so poor that you can't pay for a public school.
Mom (DYM 65).
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why do orphans want to be gay?
Because they will have someone to call "daddy" for once.
I was high in high school, but not as high as the people jumping from the buildings.
What does a British cannibal's favorite meal?
Fish and chaps.
I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.
What's a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.
Fat moms.
A lady comes into the boys' bathroom and a boy sees her.
"This is not a girls' bathroom," he says.
She answers, "I don’t care," she says, "I NEED TO PEE!"
Q: What's worse than f**king a 2 year old?
A: Wiping the blood off of your clown suit afterwards.
I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
Made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, there is no homepage.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.