Why can’t orphans eat a big bag of chips?
They are family sized.
Society Jokes
Who are the fastest readers in the world? New Yorkers. They went through 110 stories in under 10 seconds.
What do you call an Islamic LGBT member? A Gaylism.
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
Why did the orphans go to the church?
Because they need someone to call "father."
Why can't antelopes get married?
Because they can't elope.
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read?
The waffle iron.
I drove my new rainbow-colored car today. For some reason, it wouldn't go straight.
Welcome to Dave’s orphanage. You make it, we take it.
What would Bill Cosby be if he was white?
Innocent.
Guys, I know how to stop racism. Delete the word "racism." People can't be something that doesn't exist.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To drop some STREET KNOWLEDGE on the other side.
What does a priest and Christmas tree have in common? The balls are just for decoration.
"A friend with weed is a friend indeed."
How long does it take a black woman to take out the trash?
About nine months and a day.
I went to jail because I gave the orphan kid a calendar with 363 days.
(I deleted Mother's Day and Father's Day.)
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
Why do Jews have big noses?
Because air is free...
BlessedBrian's family reunions must be like a casting call for the Addams Family.
