I heard the Kardashians were going on a cruise soon.
As if there's not already enough plastic in the ocean.
Me: Mom, if Adam and Eve are white, then how were slaves made?
Mom: Well, Eve and the monkey fucked each other.
Me: Oh, okay.
Goes to school.
Teacher: How were humans made?
Me: Eve fucked the monkeys.
Teacher: š
Why do police never put an orphan in prison? It's too much like a home.
What is the difference between an Apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
Who says white people can't jump?
Have you seen the 911 footage?
The 11th of September is considered 9/11 in America. The Twin Towers fell on 9/11 in 2001, but to call an emergency in America, you dial 911! š® You could say they dialed that correctly.
Why donāt orphans play baseball?
Because they canāt find home.
Why canāt orphans be criminals?
Because theyāre not wanted!
Bored? Punch an orphan! Who are they gonna tell, their parents?
I like Christmas.
Itās the holiday where an old man breaks into peopleās homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay š
What do orphans have in common with stray dogs?
Nothing, they are both orphans.
The daughter milked her dad. It turns out it wasn't milk...
What do you call an orphan family? None existent.
If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. They're independent women, after all. Heck, cheer on the rapist, or join in the fun.
I have an orphan joke.
But it needs parental guidance.
What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.
What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.
Why can't people in Africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach.
What does a British cannibal's favorite meal?
Fish and chaps.
All terrorists like starting a new year off with a bang.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
