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Smoking jokes

Best
Newest

Jack

JACK smoked some shit in the casino bathroom.

Then fucked a slut, played some slots, took some shots, then shot a JOKER!

It's a sad story, because JACK killed himself, but he died with a smile.

Memes

Month

The meme shows a castle with a skull-shaped entrance, set against a dark and cloudy sky. The text overlay reads, "YOU CAN LIVE IN THIS COOL AND BADASS CASTLE FOR 6 MONTHS RENT FREE BUT NO MORE SMOKING METH AND BEATING YOUR WIFE AND KIDS. COULD YOU DO IT??"

More Smoking memes

Smoker

What do you call a person who smokes?

Smokey the Bear.

Weed

I told my doctor I was experiencing some back pain. He told me to smoke some weed because I had chronic back pain.

Pool

What's written on the bottom of a Belgian swimming pool?

"No smoking."

Memes

Cigarette

Welp

A three-panel cartoon shows a man being threatened by a robber, who is smoking, who says 'Ya know, cigarettes are gonna kill you someday'. The man replies 'Ya, sure, whatever pal'. In the final panel, the man is being chased by armed cigarettes and a match.

Tire

Do it

The image shows a white car with its rear end facing the viewer and smoke coming from the tires. The text overlay reads "SMOKE TIRES" at the top and "NOT DRUGS" at the bottom.

Pope

The image shows the Twin Towers on September 11, 2001, with smoke billowing from them. The text reads: "White smoke!!! New pope is american."

Dog

OMG

A boxer dog wears sunglasses and has a large, toy joint in its mouth, labeled "PAW". There is a "*Patent Pending" message in the corner.

Problem

The image shows three frames. The first shows a hand holding a glass ball with red smoke inside and the text "It's a remembrall. The smoke turns red when you've forgotten something." The second frame depicts a young man in a school uniform holding a red ball and saying, "The only problem is I can't remember—". The third frame shows the same young man close-up and large text that says "WHERE GONDOR WAS WHEN THE WESTFOLD FELL."

Bro

A person with a very prominent nose is featured in a video. A comment below says, "Bro could smoke a cigar in the rain."

Cigarette

The image is a poster with the text "Cigarettes are like squirrels. They are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire. NO SMOKING". There is a picture of a squirrel on the right side of the poster.

Character

Hollow Knight Meme

The image shows a Discord message. The user SkinnyBird asks, "Still think Marajuana isn't bad?" followed by two images of the Hollow Knight character. The first character is labeled "No smoke" and is the normal form of the character. The second, below, is labeled "2 smoke" and shows a dramatically transformed and deteriorated form of the character.

Million

L

Cigarette

A collage of four images showing a cigarette being deep-fried. The top left image shows a hand holding a cigarette. The top right image shows a cigarette being deep-fried in oil. The bottom left image shows the deep-fried cigarette. The bottom right image shows the deep-fried cigarette broken in half.

Bad habit

The image shows a poster titled "Bad Habits" depicting a boy engaging in various undesirable behaviors. The poster is divided into twelve panels, each illustrating a different bad habit such as disrespecting parents, not doing homework, smoking, dacoity, dealing heroin, unprotected sex with prostitutes, insider trading, arms trading, stem cell research, war crimes, running an illegal abortion clinic, and not washing hands before meals. Each panel includes a small illustration of the boy with a label for the bad habit, both in English and Hindi. The bad habits portrayed escalate from minor misbehavior to serious illegal activities.

Weed

Shitpost-master general

A weed bag with Spongebob smoking is lying on the ground with the text "Do NOT want to run into whoever been smoking this." on the bottom of the image.

Cigarette

A diptych of two images. On the left, a hand holds a clear, yellowish popsicle with several cigarettes frozen inside it, filters facing downwards. The background is blurry green foliage. On the right, the same hand holds the same popsicle, but a bite has been taken out of the top, revealing the wet, brown tobacco inside. Above the images, text reads, "Nothing beats cigarette popsicles on a hot summer day".

Puff

VAPING IS ALSO BAD

The image is an infographic about the dangers of smoking. It lists many of the negative health effects of smoking. It states that within 10 seconds of a puff, toxic chemicals reach organs. Smoking harms most of the body, increases disease risk, and affects look, feel, finances and people close to you. Nicotine in tobacco is highly addictive and it releases dopamine. Nicotine dependence happens when the brain craves dopamine. Smoking is a major cause of cardiovascular disease, heart attack, and stroke. It increases the risk of blood clots. Some smokers have limbs amputated due to blood circulation problems. A graph lists the annual deaths caused by cigarette smoking in the United States between 2005-2009. It shows over 479,989 deaths. The causes include: lung cancer, ischemic heart disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, other diagnoses, stroke, and other cancers. The stages of lung cancer are shown.

Foot

A foot holding a blunt, with text above saying "Gonna get fucked up tn."

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