Sleep Jokes

Conversation between a little baby and a lady👇

👱LADY: Hi. 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: What is your name? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: How old are you? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: What is your mom's name? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: What about your dad? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: Can you spell your name? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: Can you spell GOD? 💂LIT.BABY: (spelling) G.O.D

If a little baby can spell GOD, what about you? Just spend some minutes and type "GOD" if [you] know [that you] will sleep and wake up tomorrow by GOD's grace, ignore if you are living by power. MINE: GOD 😃

I do not understand why people aren't scared of spiders. I mean, like they have 87447924872320984623879480327678987388025873289576348097923408370983728 legs and 23864867759578590893839420387424763478923748394783294327428748243264278 eyes.

I saw a spider in my room. YOU THINK I'M GONNA SLEEP IN THERE?????????

Nope. I'm moving to Japan.

KONNICHIWA

Why does Adam sleep early so his mum and stepdad can fuck on his bed?

What time is it when you say wake up? It is morning

Where did the cake sleep on the stove?

In a pan.

real

A close-up of a person's face with large, dark eyes. The image is grainy and blue-tinted. The text "oh shit it's 4am" is at the top.

When I go to bed, my mother comes in ten minutes later with a brick and beats me with it.

It’s raining, it’s pouring. The old man is snoring. He got shot in the head and didn’t wake up in the morning.

Why do mountains go to sleep a lot?

Because they are high.

What did one pillow say to the other?

Nothing, meh, they just sang a song about a rogue chicken whose feathers had been sacrificed to make them.

Last night I had a dream of lead, but your mom won't let me tell you.

What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?

A criminal! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃

My mom was poor, so we had nothing to eat. I slept on the floor, but now I'm rich, rich, rich 😜

What is the difference between the human and a human and walk home walk and walk walk home and walk walk home from school tyyy

What did the knight say when he went to bed?

"Good Knight!" lul

Minecraft YouTube, but I can sing Believer!

YouTube, but I'm making a first video in YouTube.

And I record all the Minecraft videos and upload.

Ooohh! To try it and upload. Ooohh!

I've been recorded to streaming, couple more sleeps to do the dreaming.

I finally get to the stronghold, and if you told me, you told me, you told me, you told me.

Place some more ender eyes, and it's time to big surprise.

It's time to kill the ender dragon, go into the...

END!

Take that crystal, take that crystal, Believer, Believer!

Knock him down, knock him down, Believer, Believer!

Axe it's head, axe it's head.

Axe it's head, defeat him.

SUBSCRIBE!!!

The vampire was kept awake all night because of his wife's coughin' (coffin...coughin'...get it?)

I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.

The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"

That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.