One time in my dream, I had a dream that all people in wheelchairs could walk. It was awesome; I could walk!
Sleep Jokes
So here's the joke. A bear walks into a bar and sits down and then....then..........then................................zzzz
I hope both sides of your pillow are warm tonight.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Dentist said I grind in my sleep... he a real one for that.
I told a diabetic girl to have sweet dreams...
she died the next morning.
I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).
This girl came to me and said, "I got raped in my sleep!"
I replied, "I done it as a joke."
-April 1, 2020
You were sleeping, it didn't count - Chloe Foxwell 2021:)))))))
When you turn off all the annoying beeping things in the hospital, and everyone starts sleeping better.
Everything is now so expensive in Africa that witches don’t serve food in dreams again. Am I lying? Okay, when last did you eat in your dreams?
How to get a girl in three steps:
Step 1: grab a pillow.
Step 2: grab a blanket.
Step 3: keep dreaming.
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
Someone walks up to his dad and says, "Dad, what’s the difference between potentiality and reality?" Soo ok, the dad says to the son, "Go ask your mother, sister, and your brother if they’d sleep with the postman for $1,000,000." So the son comes back 5 minutes later and said, "Dad, they all said they would sleep with the postman." So, son, potentially, we have a million dollars, but in reality, we have two sluts and a gay one."
Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
'Cause they don't got balls to scratch.
"Rock-a-bye baby on the treetop, When the wind blows, the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, Not moving a muscle, not making a sound."
Yo mama so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed!
Why was the broom late? Because it had overslept.
Q. When is your grandfather's bedtime?
A. Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
What did the blanket say when he fell off the bed?
Oh sheet!
