Size jokes
Yo momma so fat, she glues together rags as clothes.
Yo mama is so fat, it took Nationwide 15 years to get on her side.
Yo mama so short, she wakes up every day in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.
Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork, but bigger ones need a crane.
What do you call a fat midget?
A pig.
Jacob has a small penis.
If the shoe fits perfectly, why did it fall off?
I wondered why the ball was getting bigger... then it hit me.
Yo mama so fat, she got more rolls than the sand dunes.
I rolled over a log and underneath was a tiny little stick, and I was like, "That log had a child!"
Yo mama is so fat, when she came on this website, the whole server crashed!
A tiny psychic escaped from jail, and the news said there a small medium at large.
What’s 12 inches and is moist inside?
My record holding cucumbers, locally grown at my farm.
Why couldn’t the midget talk?
Because someone stepped on him.
My midget landlord told me to pack my things up and that I've got 30 minutes to get out. That's short notice!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
Why do ballerinas wear tutus?
The one-ones are too small and the three-threes are too big.
What’s big, red, and eats rocks?
A big, red, rock eater.
Your mum is so fat Les Dawson would agree with me that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand, she throws it.
Yo mama so fat that Hannibal Lecter couldn't eat her up.