Dog toys are getting out of control.
My mum's dog has a round bison bone.
Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.
Short Jokes
I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
Women have eggs and milk in them...
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
What do women and pools have in common?
They both cost a lot of money to maintain for the amount of time you’re inside of them.
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
What's the worst possible thing to be playing during the funeral of a bridge-collapse victim?
Fall Guys.
This is how animals were named.
"Bye Son." *cuts call*. What are we talking about?
"Bison. Perfect."
The tortoise can't go out to play, Or sell his house or rent it. For when he moves, his house moves too, And nothing can prevent it.
What is another word for Arab man who is a Palestinian Muslim?
Palestinian masseur.
I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.
GTA 6
I got sad today.
Trump got a new jet.
He's probably already licked the windows.
Why did Kamala Harris visit the library?
To check out some “law” books and maybe return a few skeletons.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite fruit?
Boisenberry.
Why can’t trans men enjoy chocolate?
It uses Hershey pronouns.
What's the difference between a hoe and a prostitute?
One is a tool. The other is your mom.
Jesus walks into a hotel, hands the inn keeper three nails and says, "Can ya put me up for the night?"
heeeeeheeeeeeeeenjkxbzskrf
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
