Short jokes

Short jokes

Woman

When a woman says, "I need to be treated like a delicate flower," don't cut the wrong cord on the bomb.

Woman

How do you know that a woman is about to say something smart?

She starts the sentence with ‘a man once said.’

Did anyone around here lose a roll of twenty-dollar bills wrapped with a rubber band? Because we found the rubber band.

What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?

The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.

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  • Twin Towers

    What did the World Trade Center order from Domino's Pizza?

    They ordered two large planes.

    Q. If a pedophile, necrophile, and a guy who is into incest are all sitting in a car, who's driving?

    A. A police officer.

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  • Did you hear about the pervert who couldn't decide whether he was into incest or necrophilia?

    He killed his mom and then fucked her.

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  • Orphan

    Why do orphans have a single chip? Because they don't have a full bag.

    Anxiety

    My anxiety has anxiety.