Short jokes
How do terrorists feed their children?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
"And here comes the second one!"
What has two wings and an arrow?
A Chinese telephone. "Wing Wing Arrow!"
My brother was stuck in a wheelchair after a motorbike accident. He became a swimming champion until I took the VR headset off.
Your momma is so slutty, they hired her as a condom tester.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
Q. What's a dog's favourite type of sex? A. Ruff.
In Junior High, we had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood the report and wrote about how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.
What do Africans always play? They play The Hunger Games.
Why can't Paris play chess? Because they don't have their towers (also known as rooks).
Gender reveals be going crazy nowadays.
Q. What does Jeffrey Epstein get his sex partners for their birthday? A. Crayons.
What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A fruit stand.
What is the female version of t-bagging? A clam slapping.
Why was 10 afraid?
Because he was in the middle of 9 and 11.
What is the favorite movie of orphans?
Spider-Man: Homecoming.
What was the last thing to go through the minds of 9/11 jumpers?
Their ankles.
Better Friday the 13th than any Monday.
Yo, stop making 9/11 jokes. My grandpa was a pilot.
Q. Why aren't midget jokes funny?
A. They always seem to punch down.
Did you know there was food on the plane that caused 9/11?
It was the bomb.