Short jokes
Q: What kind of paper towel do they use in special education classrooms?
A: Downey.
Roses are red, I have no money, I want to be dominated by a goth mommy.
Bonnie Blue's son could win a science fair just by participating.
Why did a cop in the 1960s cross the road? To arrest a faggot for cross-dressing.
Why are modern women trash?
Because back in the day, a woman knew her place.
What do you call Liberal Scare Tactics?
A Conservative's Utopia.
The students at Columbine needed books, but all they got were magazines.
What is the best revenge for getting punished at school?
Go shoot up the school.
Why are Americans such good marksmen?
Because they had plenty of schools to practice their shooting.
Women understand each other.
That’s why they argue.
You are so skinny, you probably wipe your butt with floss.
What do women and appliances have in common?
If they don't work, hit them until they work.
I am so cool that even the fridge or a snowman would shiver his timbers when they see me :).
My boat is super fast, so I named it Usain.
Usain Boat.
What’s the benefit of dating a homeless woman?
You can drop her off anywhere.
R.I.P. on a tombstone normally means "Rest In Peace"; however, in Madeleine McCann's case, it means "Raped In Portugal".
What does Bugs Bunny say when he has a boner?
"What's up, cock?"
What are wheelchair users experts at?
Being lazy.
How are rape and airplanes similar?
The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
Phone: YEETED.
TikTok: DELETED.
Therapy: NEEDED.
Wife: BEATED.